Author Archives: drshuman

We flee from sadness.

We flee from sadness.  Attempts to discuss sadness are often deflected by people unable, apparently, to tolerate their own fears of loss and distress. In families with illness, our children and intimates are often shielded from the sadness that is … Continue reading

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At the limit of our being…

The topic I chose to write about today emerged in a quite wonderful way. This morning I was looking through some quotations to add to the “Others Words” section of www.robertshuman.com. I chose a selection from Sarah Bakewell’s book, “At … Continue reading

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Practice makes…

Perfectionism ought to be one of the first “shoulds” we give up as we experience the jumbles and fumbles of chronic illness and disability. Can we do anything “right?” Are there plans that do not go awry? Once ill or … Continue reading

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And unto him that smiteth thee on the one cheek offer also the other

Much of our suffering is unnecessary. Maybe we have met with a doctor and we are frustrated, perhaps even angry. He has sent too little time with us or she has given us inadequate information. Whatever it might be, we … Continue reading

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Who is family?

Many burdens fall our families as we live with chronic illness, aside from the obvious ones of increased demands upon resources of money, time, and physical energy. An unexpected stress is the issue raised by chronic illness of family membership … Continue reading

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Texture of time

For individuals and families living with chronic illness, the experience of the present is likely to acquire a texture much different from what prevailed before diagnosis. Illness disrupts the large and small tides and rhythms that we hold onto amid … Continue reading

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Fear is imagination wrongly used.

We are probably better off at this point to imagine his road ahead, illness or not, as a journey. The term originally meant the distance one could travel in one day. We could also remind ourselves of Lao-tse’s dictum, “the … Continue reading

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Like the waters of a flood…

It is not possible to memorialize the sufferings of each of us or our families. Maybe something useful is to approach loss from a variety of angles, reminding us how far, wide, and deep the damage may spread. Like the … Continue reading

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Am I responsible for my illness?

Yes. But first let me clarify what I mean by responsibility. It is simply the ability to respond with attention and care in an ongoing way to whatever the fates have delivered to me. Who else but I? Did I … Continue reading

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The Portuguese man of war…

From Wikipedia: The Portuguese man of war  is not a single multicellular organism but a colonial organism made up of specialized minute individual organisms called zooids. These zooids are attached to one another and physiologically integrated to the extent that they … Continue reading

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